"How much money does college cost in America?"
I’d ask if it could get any worse but I’m sure the universe would take that as a fucking challenge.
Henry III when he was still just Duke of Anjou
how do straight people even function when they are so fragile that my existence can ruin their marriage, life and ability to raise their children
Shit like this is why I don’t understand hating kids. They’re basically just tiny nightbloggers.
reverse hades/persephone, where the young daughter of summer uses plant magic to ensnare the lord of darkness and keep him prisoner in a beautiful garden above ground. Eventually, enchanted by her cleverness and wild youth he agrees to eat six pomegranate seeds and stay with her for half of every year.
fun fact: the reason that the plural of goose is geese but the plural of moose is not meese is because goose derives from an ancient germanic word undergoing strong declension, in the pattern of foot/feet and tooth/teeth, wherein oo is mutated to ee. however ‘moose’ is a native american word added to the english lexicon only ~400 years ago, and lacks the etymological reason to be pluralized in that way.
Oh baby. Keep talking dirty to me.